Pathway 8 – Al-Awwal – Sacred Surprise
So I pick up this series again, and as the pathways always surprise me and give me what’s relevant, it’s no surprise that the book opened me up to this pathway. The pathway is all about being open to the unexpected, and it is fitting for me at this time.
You’ll have noticed quite a long breather between pathways and that isn’t for lack of trying. I’ve been thinking about delving in and writing quite a lot, but the timing for picking it up again just hasn’t felt right, up until now. Spring Equinox has helped. Bringing in the light and I feel like I’m slowly waking up and getting ready to burst in to action! It has been an intense period of hibernation and hermitting!
The words that hit me when I read the pathway was, “You thought you were going in one direction and toward a specific goal, but a mysterious doorway has appeared that seems to lead in a new direction.” This made me think…
It’s interesting this, especially for me. I’ve never really known what I wanted until the moment it came upon me. I have vague notions of a future that includes a few things that I can think of, but if you asked me the question, “What is it that you want?” I would respond with something as general as World Peace. (I do want that!) If you asked me what I wanted for my own life though, I’d have trouble articulating this to you. I don’t know unless I can feel it, or it comes to me in a vision and it feels like I’m being pulled to pursue it. The not knowing helps with the element of surprise!
There are some things I know and feel absolutely certain about. My work – I know I’m doing what I’m meant to be doing although even that is bringing me unexpected surprises and veering off in different directions. My purpose – I know why I’m doing what I’m doing and I’m feeling more and more connected with a sense of belonging to this world in a way I’ve not felt before. My contribution here on this planet – I know what I am putting in to the great vortex, and the sacred surprise on some levels is showing me all that I’ve put in coming in to fruition. I have no idea what it will produce, and so this pathway leads me to just enjoy the element of surprise.
I’ve never been one for planning. I think I may have mentioned this in a previous blog. I’ve managed to reluctantly insert some semblance of structure in to my day, but I’m a fly by night, flaky, free spirit and by the way, I see that as something to be celebrated. Rules, structure, discipline – even the words send a shudder down my spine! It took me the first two years of being self-employed to get my energy out of that structure, and lo and behold, the Universe is taking me back there, surprisingly!
I’ve had a battle with structure and organisation for most of my life. I know when I’m driven by feeling something is absolutely right, it will get accomplished. I work quickly and it’s done. There’s other things that I know I avoid for months, and they take me an hour to do. It’s the wonder of the Universe, and it’s the power of motivation. There’s an energy that drives you in a certain direction, and the pull of it is difficult to resist. It may lead you to somewhere unexpected. It’s what you do when you get there that matters and how you see it. This is what I’m about to delve in to.
I don’t have any real plan which may come as a bit of a shock. I’ve surprised myself at getting this far in life without a plan. I’m not even sure if I have a direction. Being an “in the moment” kind of person, I go with the flow but then get frustrated because there’s little progress to be seen.
Life is nebulous at the best of times, and this pathway offers an inspired way of approaching the unexpected. To see it as a redirection of focus and above all, to understand that this unexpected doorway is dragging you to the next place. You can go willingly, or you can go kicking and screaming. There’s always a choice!
I like to think I go willingly, but meditating on this pathway I couldn’t help but laugh at myself because I know that I resist change. Change can be difficult for all of us. I feel like I’ve undertaken a massive transformation over the winter months, and for me seeing whatever comes and going with whatever I am inspired to do feels like the best way forward. I am working on not holding any expectations, and for me this pathway is an opening to being able to see and read synchronicities, as well as accept them. It’s following through with action – that’s the kicker!
For the logical and rational, it is difficult to follow the signs. If you’re mind brain orientated, it’s sheer foolishness to live by the breadcrumb trail. This is life we are talking about, and to put faith to the test, what better way is there than to follow the signs? It’s one way of doing it, and a way that’s as plausible as any other suggestion for how you live your life. So I decided to put this to the test and see everything that happens over the course of a week as a pleasant surprise or a redirection of focus. As the book says, “Suddenly, like Alice in Wonderland, you are in an entirely different Universe.” Interestingly, I re-read the pathway after I wrote those words, and the sentence after it says, “Or, perhaps through sudden inspiration you feel called upon to initiate some process or to start a project totally unlike anything you have done before.”
Now although I kind of live my life like this, I’ve not really done it on purpose before and so this will be an interesting experiment!
My first unexpected was finding a video testimonial for my meditation course and so I shared it. I found myself starting a new project to rewrite and relaunch the course. Hmm…ok so that’s not mindblowing but what happened over the next couple of days really was.
It was as if I was waiting for the fog to lift. I know for the last couple of months I have been hiding behind the clouds just doing what’s necessary and looking for something that felt just right. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to pick up on these pathways again because they assist my growth and help me to explore my understanding of life and the Universe.
I meditated on this pathway. I took it with no expectations and just went with what I felt like was the right thing to do. I noticed certain words in conversations that linked to things I had seen or taken notice of earlier. For example, I was on a FaceTime call to my dear friend Tomasz in Poland and he told me “Pisces season is over honey and you have to stop being a hermit now. It’s time for action!” In front of me in my journal, I had written the exact same word – Action. I took this as a signal that it was time, but then I went to sleep accomplishing nothing that day.
I woke up a little more energised the next day, and found myself ordering a planner. How very unlike me? Go with it, Hafsa. I meditated on the pathway again, and I found myself moving operations to my desk. My habit is to get all snug and cosy on the sofa with my laptop when I work, which of course means that I am surrounded by distractions and although some stuff gets done, it’s not the most productive place to work!
The next day I found myself out and about, and rather than looking at my desk, I made a Green Tea, topped up my water bottle and found myself at my desk writing. “I have arrived!” I thought. The desk has been ready for months, and rarely gets used so I freaked myself out a little. Sitting here working for some reason feels different – different good though.
Sacred Surprise indeed! Trusting that you’ll move when the time and energy feels right is a beautiful thing. Actually moving and doing that thing feels amazing because it is a follow through and a release of resistance. At least that is how it feels for me.
The flip side of this is understanding that all that procrastination, all that resistance is there for a reason. Sometimes, sacred surprise comes in a way that feels like it is literally the end of the world. When these things happen, it’s much harder to keep that same perspective.
As hard as it is to believe, even the shitty experiences are for our highest benefit. Without them, we wouldn’t be led to the good places. I can see this and an essential part of the pathway for me is this idea of taking the good with the bad. Seeing everything as merely experience for your highest benefit is a good way of looking at things. It’s quite a challenge when it’s falling apart, but we always come through it and we are always where we are meant to be.
What if the Universe is always leading you and guiding you? Of course it is but how often do we take that seriously. It’s easy to get caught up in life. I believe in this idea, and I think although I live, work and teach this – being human and having a mind gets in the way. I think it’s part of self-mastery and I’m gutted to think that for the most part, I’ve missed the signs and signals but fate is such – it had to be that way. My lesson with this pathway is definitely to always be reminding myself that the signs are there – I just need to look and follow through.
To surrender in order to be guided is a challenging aspect of self-mastery and one that I know I am always working on. We are human at the end of the day, and we will forget and slip in and out of awareness.
The most important thing for me though, and I wish this for all of you too, is that we find wonder and magic in Sacred Surprises, knowing that all the dots are joining up even when we can’t see them!
To watch the video CLICK HERE