99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 18 – Al-Ghani – Tending Your Garden

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to feel your heart as a garden in which everything you need is growing. See yourself living in this garden.”

It has been a while since I wrote on another pathway. With this one, I’ve been exploring and exploring and now it feels like the right time to write. One thing I will say is that I thought I’d do a pathway every couple of weeks – that was the plan but they don’t work in a linear way. It’s always the way that I choose one and it becomes the theme for my inner work and observation. Rather than rushing, it feels much better to explore in my own time and share when there is real wisdom that emerges. That makes it more meaningful for you and for me.

The pathway starts with talking about what happens when the heart begins to expand and seeing ourselves in others. This pathway continues to teach me the good, the bad and the ugly of who I am and this is through what I see in others.

I feel like I’ve gone through one of the biggest and deepest expansions spiritually over the last few months. I’ve had external help to guide and push me over my comfort zones and that has been amazing. It really reinforces that we can’t do everything ourselves. I’ve also been connecting more with my guides in the etheric realms and receiving deeper wisdom and guidance. I’ve been working a great deal with my power centres – the solar plexus and the sacral.

One of the biggest learnings I’ve had is understanding my place in the whole grand scheme of things, my place in the Universe. If we are all dots that are connected, I’m really starting to see that I am one of those dots and the connections that I have to the other dots and the ripples I send out by working on myself and sharing my wisdom. It takes this idea of seeing all beings as yourself to a whole other level and it’s really helped to me feel supported with what I do. Understanding that my story is part of an even bigger story and without my character, the story would change. It simply wouldn’t be the same.

Another aspect of the pathway talks about the connection between action and the vision that you have. For a long while, I’ve had a vision but for one reason or another, I just wasn’t moving very much. Deep down there plenty of fears of where it would take me. This extended the way I looked at the good, bad and ugly within myself. I realised that I was limiting myself and really not seeing the possibilities. Sometimes taking action is the thing that leads to even deeper growth. We can learn and teach wisdom but to live that wisdom enables your heart to grow. We can be authentic but we are always finding the masks and learning to continuously uncover even more authentic parts of ourselves. I did have to stop and think about this seriously and that made me realise just how much I was taking for granted. When you uncover all this wisdom, you realising that you’re not even sharing a fraction of what’s in there. Once you begin, things start to change and grow.

Tending your garden is one thing and I feel that I have planted so many seeds. With watering and nurturing, I’m beginning to see these seeds grow. I find myself changing yet paradoxically at the same time becoming more myself than I have ever been. When that seed starts to sprout a few leaves, you get excited and you know that there’s flowers to come and it’ll be glorious and beautiful. It’s being grateful that By God’s grace, the seeds we plant grow.

The pathway uses the example of the garden of life. We plant everything that we need in our life and plenty of other things that we don’t need. This garden is also a metaphor for the heart. The heart is where the truth sits. Part of the process is weeding out what’s not needed or what’s taking up space preventing other things from growing. There are plenty of distractions and reasons not to do things and the more I think and ponder, the more I procrastinate. I decided it was time to pull these weeds out and call them out. It involved a lot of harsh truths but at the end of the day, they’re blocking my sunshine. It doesn’t matter how much you water and nurture yourself, without the sunshine you’ll wither. I liken this to what I’ve been through. I’d found my inner light but I was afraid of shining and now I really am facing that in a big way, things are really starting to change.

It’s only been a couple of months, but I am really not who I used to be. I feel myself shining, confident and bursting with colour. It makes the old me look like a dull hum in comparison. Now I’m conducting a whole orchestra making magical, harmonious sound frequencies. This is the power of tending your garden. This is the power of tending to your own heart.

I have found that even being open, warm and loving as a person, I was still quite guarded and I had the fear of trusting. When we look at the garden of our heart, we also look at the boundaries. Do we want to limit how big our garden gets? That’s something that I was not even conscious I was doing and bringing it to light has really helped me to make a shift. With this, belief is also key. It’s fine to say “I’m not going to limit myself” but it’s an even deeper shift when you say, “I’m willing to accept the reality that all things are possible for me.” We can protect ourselves as much as we want to but at the end of the day if we don’t believe that we are protected by a Source greater than ourselves, we form barriers to love and limitations to growth. There is an even greater plan for me than what I can imagine for myself. The possibility of that being true brings infinite other possibilities and the beautiful part is not being afraid of those possibilities anymore.

 “Another message of this pathway is that everything need not be done in the spotlight. Let the One veil you (another type of enclosure) and keep your secrets as you get on with your purpose in life.”

This is apt and it’s kind of been happening behind the scenes. I’ve been working on the business, in the business and on myself in this way. It’s only now I feel like I’m beginning to consolidate and share.

Deep changes and even deeper transformation. I really feel like the adventure has officially begun!

99 Pathways of the Heart

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 17 – Al-Matin – Step by Step Persistence

There’s some pathways you come across where you know that there’s a life lesson involved and there’s pathways that show you just how far you’ve come. This was a bit of both for me.

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to connect with the sacred qualities of practicality and deliberation, of small steps taken over a long period of time.”

I know there’s been a massive gap between the last pathway and this one and that’s because there has been a lot of learning and integration that has taken place in the time in between.

In the last pathway I talked a lot about shadow work and learning to take responsibility for the parts of yourself that are difficult to own. I feel that this pathway has taken me in a lot deeper and shown me how shadows work on a whole new level.

The pathway talks about step by step persistence. It says, “Love also demands this type of persistence, especially when a relationship has begun to mature beyond attraction, in to something deeper.”

This is what I’ve been exploring on a number of levels within myself since I last posted on my journey with the pathways. Self-love is something that I’ve been learning to cultivate for a long time and one of the biggest realisations was just how much deeper I needed to go with this.

I feel like my relationship with myself and also with my work has reached that level of maturity that the pathway talks about. I relate it to my own journey. When I first discovered energy healing, it led me to create an idea of who I wanted to be and the work I wanted to do. As I travelled on this path, I started becoming that woman I always saw myself to be and doing the work I wanted to do. I saw myself making the difference I wanted to make and I am achieving that.

I look upon that now as the honeymoon period when I started to fall in love with myself, or at least this idea of who I wanted to be. I put all my effort and energy in to pursuing this dream. I worked hard to become that person and find what needed to be healed.

As my relationship with myself and the love I have cultivated for myself and my work starts to mature and deepen, I find that there are challenges and it doesn’t get easier. The more we uncover about ourselves, the more we are challenged to love our imperfections. The more we are challenged, the deeper in to ourselves it takes us.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve really been paying attention to what’s happening in my life. I’m observing what I’m doing and saying. I’m observing what other people are doing and saying and I am learning a great deal. To be able to watch without judging, that is a labour of love. To love without attachment, that is an art in itself.

I find I’m not the woman I fell in love with. I’m not willing to be defined that way or any way but I’m finding I love myself anyway. Who I am, just like any long term relationship, has morphed and changed. It just is what it is and doesn’t need defining anymore. When that happens, that relationship really doesn’t look like what you thought it would. When you get to this place, you realise that kind of love takes strength. It takes persistence and courage. It takes a conscious decision that even though it isn’t what you thought it would be, you’re choosing to love it anyway.

My path over the last few weeks has been a rollercoaster on a personal and emotional level. I’ve had some really tough challenges and I’ve had to really make a decision about how I feel about myself and what I’m going to do for myself out of love for myself. It’s meant shutting down for a while. It’s meant standing my ground. It’s meant not allowing anyone else’s opinion to cloud how I feel. It’s meant reaching in for my own truth. It’s meant expressing, sharing and really pushing myself out of my comfort zone.

The detail of what I’m facing is irrelevant but suffice to say that there will always be people who try to bring you down. Some with their words and some with their actions. I say this because with the last pathway we talked about being responsible for ourselves and our projections. I’m also learning to discern my own truth and that means that rather than own everything, I’m recognising that people play out their own pain by throwing it at other people. This is what I mean when I say “To be able to watch without judging, that is a labour of love. To love without attachment, that is an art in itself.” I’m not willing to own someone else’s pain. I bless their journey but I know what’s mine and what’s not.

If you allow anything to cause doubt within yourself, you lose. When you love another, you trust them with your whole heart and you don’t doubt if they are true. When you love yourself, you must see it exactly the same way. I’ve learnt this and it’s unearthed a massive strength in me.

Persistence means that you have to fight for yourself. As an empath, I’m great at fighting for others but maybe not so good at fighting for myself. One of things that this pathway has shown me is just how much I love myself and love my work. When push comes to shove, if my ability to do my work is threatened, I will fight to the death and I will win. Nothing is going to bring me down and each time it tries to take me down, I come back a hell of a lot stronger. That’s because I know what I bring to this world is important. I’m fighting for me but I’m also fighting for all of those people who benefit from what I do.

I think the most beautiful thing that’s come alive for me is this fire that I know I’ve always had in me. I think as you reach in to spirituality, you almost believe that you need to put that fire out for the sake of love and light. That fire is courage in adversity. That fire is fighting for what you believe in. That fire is a relentless amount of self-assuredness. That fire must never be diluted, especially for those that are making a difference in this world.

None of this comes without persistence. None of this comes without a fight. None of this comes without being challenged. For me, I didn’t realise it but this is what I’ve been building step by step. I couldn’t see it at the time, but everything leads you to the moment where you’re at right now. Perhaps you need to be challenged for you to find your strength? Perhaps you need the darkness to come at you for you to overcome it?

I believe that this is all the alchemy of the Universe at work. Every action is a small step towards something greater. I sometimes forget there’s a bigger picture and get bogged down in the detail of it all but I’m human. It sometimes takes adversity to show you just how far you have travelled.

I take great strength from this pathway. It’s a long journey full of twists and turns, full of challenges but look how beautiful it can be. It’s designed to help you find yourself and if you can see that, you’ll keep at it.

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 16 – Flexible Strength

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to feel a flexible strength that can adapt to any situation and yet remain rooted in, and moving toward, the purpose of your life.”

This pathway came at just the right time for me to integrate many of the lessons that I am learning on this journey. I’ve talked before about distraction and how sometimes being an empath can mean that you get absorbed and pulled in to everyone else’s stuff. We can feel resentful because our full focus is not on our own mission.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been consciously looking at how I get pulled away and distracted and I’ve made a lot of changes. The first thing that I want to say is thank you to all the true friends that have understood that I’ve needed me and my work to come first. It’s appreciated more than you know.

One of aspects of this pathway is developing strength from the way that we look at the past. For those of you that know me, you’ll know I do a lot of work with the shadow aspect. The shadow is all about looking at all the things that you’re not so comfortable with and I feel that it’s a way of breaking down the ego.

The pathway talks about forgetting the past and just keeping going. I find this really interesting and I don’t take that literally. I think there is much to be gained by understanding that you can’t just put your past in a box and pretend that it doesn’t exist. Part of shadow work is to revisit some of the more uncomfortable parts and to work through them and with them in a way that allows us to learn more about who we are. This process helps us to accept parts of ourselves that we may have disowned because of shame or anger at the way we behaved. Learning love and compassion for yourself means that you have to go in and be able to accept all of this to be whole.

We all have parts of ourselves that we don’t care to name and shame because it is deeply troubling. These parts usually are distinguished as the judgements we make about others. It’s hard to accept that that’s ourselves being reflected back at us. I know when I first started working with my shadow aspects, it sent me in to deep despair and it was so easy to let those things bring me down. That was because I didn’t fully own them and I hadn’t healed from them and so they still had a lot of power of me as a person.

It is easy when we face adversity to act out old shadows. Sometimes it is that inner child surfacing and being able to face yourself takes courage. It means being able to feel pain, shame, anger, fear and know that it has a place within you along with everything else. The spiritual journey isn’t all love and light and rainbows and unicorns! There are times when it is deeply uncomfortable getting to the truth. And the truth isn’t always fashionable enough to wear so we wear a mask instead. All of this starts to become apparent as you work with the shadow. It takes courage and being human, sometimes my courage fails but I think even approaching your shadow is a good start.

I do this because I want to be authentically myself. Sometimes authenticity can get lost in politeness and people pleasing. You’ll notice how that feels in yourself and I know that I don’t like it. I don’t like letting people down but when it’s a choice between that and letting myself down, I’ve learnt that it’s not always easy to choose me. It’s something that will take time to master and there’s a lot to work through.

There is darkness within all of us but part of our inner work is to face it and begin the alchemical process of transmuting it and learning to shine light on it so that it becomes something more than just a painful memory. From this process, we develop the flexible strength that this pathway is teaching us about. A person is more than the sum of their parts. When we identify all the parts, we become that something more. This is what I’m talking about. It isn’t the easiest thing to name those parts and become that something more.

When you know yourself, you are truly resilient in the face of adversity. When you are reluctant to face all aspects of yourself, you’re likely to be triggered. I think it always goes, “Trigger first, lesson later!” We need time to ponder and reflect and life is amazing in the way that it presents the lessons to us on a plate. Each trigger is an opportunity to learn and grow. Sometimes it starts with a bitch and a vent, but as you work through it, you realise that you need to own that judgement that you’ve made because it’s showing you who you are. When you’re at peace with it, you’ll experience it without being triggered. This is true strength.

There’s “who we like to think we are” versus “who we actually are” and the ego likes to hold on to it’s ideas about our identity and how we define ourselves. We have deeply set ideas, some so deep set that we’ve yet to see them.

There’s always more to do in breaking down the ego and it can sometimes feel like you’re treading water and that you’ll never be free of it. Even that is an acceptance in itself. You are in the actual process when you acknowledge it and try to make peace with it. It always feels better to me to acknowledge that I am on my way to something. It’s the process that’s more important than the outcome. When we focus on the outcome, we realise that it’s too big. When we focus on the process, we see that we’re taking steps towards something. A step in the direction you’re choosing feels better than perfection.

It’s always interesting to say the least working with the shadow aspect. We start to discover just how many lies we have told ourselves – more than we care to admit. It’s a level of honesty that you can’t really be ready for when it hits you. It makes sense to do it though because you arrive at a truer version of yourself than the one you are now. Constantly moving and evolving to get to the truth of who you are is meaningful work and it grows you.

And once you start on the quest for truth, you can’t stop!

99 Pathways of the Heart

99 Pathways of the Heart – Being an “Old Soul”

Pathway 15 – Al-Muqaddim – Preparing the way

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to acknowledge the part of your being that feels “oldest,” and prepare the way for power to flow through your life.”

So this is the pathway that I have been exploring and it started with a healing transmission that I did at the beginning of November which started a profound shift for me in terms of accessing the oldest parts of my being.

Power is an interesting concept, particularly for me. Since I began on this journey, everything has been about stepping in to my power and continuously I’m finding newer ways to do this. I had some funny ideas about power when I first started on this journey, but as I’ve grown, I’ve come to see it as a positive force in my life.

The pathway really is about delving in to who we are. Our souls were created long before our bodies were and so that part of us has lived and acquired a great deal of wisdom.

One of the things I noticed as soon as I started work with this pathway was the number of references made in relation to me being an “old soul.” The first time I heard that phrase I must have been about 17 and I’d sneaked away to London for the day. I went to Camden Market and was mooching around. I met this guy who looked like an old sage and he was full of love and life. I can still see his face. We ended up chatting for a long while. He caught sight of the palm of my hand and asked if he could have a look. I felt a bit hesitant but I agreed. He told me I was a very old soul but it wouldn’t be later in life until I realised what that meant. I’d completely forgotten about this experience and now that I’m writing about it, it brings it all back for me.

The story came back to me because I’ve only just realised that what he set in motion has resulted in this here today and I believe he knew exactly what he was doing. In this work, I am fortunate enough to be deliberately and consciously setting in motion change for those I work with.

It made me look at how I work with people and what I’m able to access. The pathway drew me to connect even deeper within myself. We spend life trying to define who we are in this world when really who we are sits within our soul. Once we start connecting to that deeper sense, everything in life starts to move around us for us to be able to fully understand and return to that original soul self.

The pathway is about returning back to our original image and this journey here in this world is what creates the means for us to do this. Life teaches us the nature of who we really are on one level. I’m talking about going beyond that. I’m talking about being from a place that you can’t access in a physical way.

For those of you who have read previous blogs, you’ll know that I talk about “going home” and by that I mean that place where we came from that’s before this world or any other world. It always seemed separate from me until I started to understand how to channel it in this world. I have more of a sense of belonging now that I ever have.

The adventure with this pathway was to learn how to go deeper within and I have found that connecting with this idea that I have been this energy for much longer than the 39 years here on earth has had a profound shift in my energy. I understand power on a much deeper level and it really is having an impact on the way I’m choosing to live.

The whole world looks different to me as a result. I’ve always been seeking to find my place here on Earth and each time I find it, I find new levels of understanding it. It’s not possible, I don’t think, to understand your place here unless you also understand where your soul has been.

I’m blessed to be an old soul and it really is becoming a distinct part of who I am. It gives me a uniqueness as a person. It has also made me curious enough to delve deeper. All of this enquiry is for a reason – this I know for certain. Synchronistically with this pathway, I’ve discovered aspects of my ancestry that have helped me to understand my spiritual gifts on a much deeper level. When healing is literally in your blood, you have no choice but to accept that’s who you are. It’s beautiful and it’s taken my sense of belonging to another level which is great for me and for the world!

I think the most amazing aspect of this pathway though is allowing yourself to open up and letting the power of YOU flow through. The more you access this part of yourself, the more you are preparing the way for what’s to come next. One of the beautiful things about this pathway is that it opens you up to wonder. I always talk about potential and fulfilling that potential but this is on a whole other level. It’s like you’ve got back up and support and everything you need. It’s like you are that potential in every moment.

With this pathway being so profound and deep, I’m actually having a challenging time in articulating how it’s making me feel. Suffice to say though that like all the other ways, it is changing me for the better. The closest phrase to describe how I feel is that “I am really coming into my own.” That sort of captures it.

The feelings you get when you’re accessing this are out of this world. Phenomenal. I wish I could tell you how or what to do to get there because everyone needs to feel this. I’m still integrating and working that out but when I have that in a practical form, I will share it. There is a sense of pride that comes from knowing yourself in this way. It isn’t an ego thing, simply a sense of contentment and being sure about who you are. This may not make much sense but if you know, you know.

There is a whole other world and worlds within worlds to discover. Such is the beauty of connecting to yourself, your power, your lineage, your ancestry, and the source of all that power.

“This is love.

To fly toward a secret sky,

to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment.

First to let go of life.

Finally, to take a step without feet.”

Rumi

99 Pathways of the Heart

99 Pathways of the Heart – Maintaining and nourishing yourself

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to feel a very steady yet powerful state of awareness in your being that maintains and nourishes you and others.”

This is the pathway that I’ve been reflecting on this past week and it is one that presents plenty of challenges for me. Embodying a steady state is something that I have been working on for as far as I can remember. For me, there is a juxtaposition here with being a free spirit.

This pathway requires pulling yourself inwards whilst you experience life. Being a free spirit, it’s easy for my heart to be called elsewhere. I want to talk about this because for me it is one the most challenging aspects of who I am as a person. This is where the conflict lies and I’m noticing that it is how my power escapes sometimes.

I know I have this immense reservoir of love within me and the capacity to nourish and give to others. This pathway takes me further in to using this source to help maintain myself and it is this very thing that I have been trying to do for a long time. This pathway has helped me to uncover a whole other level and given me an awareness and perspective that goes deeper.

For those of us that are empathic, it’s very easy to relegate our own needs in order to serve others. We think that this is why we came here – to serve. That’s part of it but not the whole of it.

This pathway really made me look at the way I give and the expectations that I have created from others around me. When I began to pull it back and go within, what struck me is how very little I have given myself. With a reservoir so large, it’s almost as if I think can survive on a lot less from the pot so rather than taking from it, I put in to it. This brings up feelings of guilt and feeling selfish. At the same time, I look around me and notice that perhaps I feel this more because of the belief that I came here to serve. There are deep set emotions here about worthiness attached to this and whether I deserve to take when I can give so much. It became obvious to me that there was very little balance in my life when it came to this.

It’s been a really challenging week and working with this pathway has actually made me feel really sad. I have to be raw and honest about how I feel. That’s what this space is for and it needs to be expressed.

The pathway also reminds me that I must not overextend myself. This is what occurred to me and I can see clearly where I am doing this. I can blame being an empath to some extent but the truth of it is that I have plenty of fleeting whims and distractions all created by my ego to prevent me from embodying this state. I can see that very clearly. I realised that I can’t hide behind anything anymore. Especially not when it has been shown to me this clearly. When you realise how little you have given yourself, it brings up anger and resentment and I’ve had to spend a lot of time working with this. I’ve allowed this and I forgive myself. I can change and that is what I am doing. Easy statements to make but if you’ve ever gone through this, you’ll know the raw emotion it brings up.

This idea of sacrifice comes with this type work and it’s something that keeps coming up for me to clear away. The idea that being in service should be at the expense of your own self simply isn’t true. I am entitled to a life just like everyone else. There’s a paradox here as the “service” is actually what I have chosen to do. It’s my own path I’m creating so it is as much for me as it is for humanity. The ego makes you choose one or the other and we are conditioned to believe that choosing service to others is the better thing to do. In actual fact, we can have both but it takes a lot of unlearning which I am still learning to do.

When I call the ego out on this, the contradictions are so very obvious. There is so much pain in saying goodbye to old ways of being. I’ve always tried to be conscious of what my ego is doing and exploring the pathways has brought up a lot of wounds that need to be healed within myself.

It isn’t easy getting the balance within yourself between serving others and serving yourself. We are brought up with conditioning that tells us that putting ourselves first is selfish. We’re taught a linear way of thinking that suggests that if we think about ourselves first, it means that we don’t care about others. It’s difficult to shift to a way of thinking that enables you to be equal to others and there’s a perception that to consider yourself equal equates to being egotistical. It gets really complicated because you can think this logically in your head but when the feelings of guilt show themselves, your heart gets pulled straight back. This is what I’m grappling with.

I’m always banging on about self-worth and I’m a work in progress but what I am learning here has come at a critical time for me. My life is interesting because of the demanding nature of my work. I get phone calls and text messages all the time asking me all sorts of things. I’ve always felt the need to answer and help and I don’t regret helping. I do sometimes resent the demands and that’s me being really honest. I take full responsibility for this now where in the past I’d have blamed others. I’ve created and met these expectations without even thinking about it and it’s difficult to undo without experiencing emotional turmoil. Meeting demands is what I’ve been looking at taking a step back from because there is a line where my work ends and I begin and that can get blurred very easily. Even though boundaries have been set, a plea for help is a plea for help and my heart isn’t one that can ignore it easily. So it’s been an emotional time because for each time that has happened, I’ve had to ask myself who I am putting first. I’m learning to deal with the emotion that comes with it and I can tell you it isn’t easy but it is necessary. This is a spiritual lesson that needs to be learned.

A strong feeling of discomfort comes from taking a step back. It’s like going against what your heart is telling you when you don’t reply to a plea for help but I had to explore this feeling for myself. It feels as if people are relying on me. It feels that there is an urgency for them that I am ignoring and that somehow makes me a bad person. Again, this linear way of thinking is one I’m learning to undo because a lot of that conditioning simply isn’t true.

What I have realised with this pathway is that I go deep and I do have a lot to give. My priority has become to maintain that within myself. Embodying a steady state of awareness and power is important but I didn’t realise how important it was for maintaining and nourishing myself. I thought I was doing that and I know now that I am not doing enough of it. The reason for this is the raw emotion, the guilt, the anger, the feeling selfish that I’m still learning to overcome. And all this just to feel equal to others! It’s mind blowing because I thought I was overcoming myself in terms of self-worth but there’s always more I need to be shown and more I need to do.

It’s interesting because although I do take a lot of time for myself and I switch off when I have to, I’ve developed some sticky habits when it comes to work. It’s the belief that work overrides everything because of it’s nature. It doesn’t though. What overrides everything is my state of being and my ability to maintain and nourish myself and I’m starting to look at that as often as I can in response to meeting the worlds demands on me. I’m taking it one moment at a time and seeing how it feels to choose me.

Just when you think you’ve got the self-worth thing down, the universe throws you a massive curve ball. With things changing as rapidly as they are, this is a very valuable lesson that the universe is giving me. I’ve noticed how quickly it can become about everything else. I’ve noticed how my free spirit slips away under the mask of empathy.

Old beliefs and old habits are dying hard. I’m working hard on taking the shame out of “I’m putting myself first.” It’s one I think a lot of us can relate to. If nice people finish last, I’m not ok with that and so I’m determined to prove that wrong.

I am just as important as everyone else and I’m determined not to forget it!

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 13 – Ar-Rauf – Healing Wings

So after quite a long break, I decided today to pick back up on the pathways again because it felt like I needed to reconnect. The last few months have been a time for extreme expansion and inner healing for me and so I caught this pathway and found myself working through it. It’s always as if this book knows exactly what is needed and this is the beauty of life. If you seek answers, you’ll find them. Sometimes, it isn’t the answer we were looking for. Sometimes it is the truth and we find that hard to bear, but nevertheless it is an answer.

This pathway is about reconnecting your heart to Unity. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that we do not exist in isolation from others. I’ve always been quite a solitary person. I’ve also been a very strong person and my story always goes, “I don’t need anyone.”

The one thing I have learnt from my story is that when you give off the vibe that you don’t need anyone, you attract people that couldn’t care less about you. Have a think about that one. I know I did.

Receiving help and healing from others is one of the hardest things that I have had to learn. I am still learning it if I’m really honest.

This pathway for me showed me what that was all about. The last few months for me have been a struggle to stay in balance. When the ego falls away, we feel lost. When all our beliefs are challenged, we question who we are. When we feel lost, we need help and coming in to balance means that we need to connect on three deep levels.

Firstly we need to connect with Divine Source to truly be able to see the world through Creator’s eyes. We need to connect deep within ourselves to discover our desires and joy. We also need to connect ourselves with everything that is around us because like I said, we do not exist in isolation.

Without going in to too much detail, I’ve had experiences over the last few months that have really challenged me on all three levels and the expansion and awareness has changed me. For me this pathway is about recognising the struggle that we have when we become disconnected.

We think we have everything sussed and sorted and then along comes someone or something that brings out a whole lot more in you that needs to be healed. Someone or something that makes you question what you believe in. Someone or something that makes you admit what you really want isn’t in alignment with your story. Someone or something that allows you to open up and receive help and healing.

It is opening on a deep level and often these things are unexpected and meant to throw you off balance. All UNLEARNING is learning and part of the soul’s journey is to disconnect to be able to reconnect. We can arrive in a comfort zone with our spirituality unless we continuously challenge what we hold to be true. That in itself brings us to a better understanding of the Divine, of ourselves and of the world around us.

This separation between ourselves and Creator/ourselves/our world is something I want to touch on because for a lot of empaths like me, we have this yearning for home. We don’t know where home is but we have always had this longing and this deep sadness because we feel separated from it. Those of you who know, will know.

This pathway pointed to something quite poignant for me. It led me to explore all the times that I had tried to heal the separation within myself. The separation and disconnectedness can be healed through this idea that we are part of Unity. That is home.

Being spiritual isn’t simply about a set of ideals and beliefs. It’s about connecting on the three levels that I have mentioned. It is about striving to achieve that balance within yourself. It’s about repairing all the connections and this for me is the deepest kind of healing.

Sometimes we are shown through trauma and experience. Sometimes we are shown by another person who has entered our lives to teach us this very lesson. All I know is that you need to dig deep and challenge what you think you already know about yourself. For me, it was reminding myself that I also need help.

It is when I need help, comfort, affection that I am at my most vulnerable because it challenges my story. I’m admitting this here and now and I’m choosing to see this as a strength. Over the last few months, I’ve seen what compassion really is from people I would not have expected it from and it’s taken me to new depths in the way I operate in the world.

I’ve learnt what it means to receive compassion and real love and to be able to express it for another. I’ve learnt that I am absolutely safe being vulnerable because I trust that Divine is always looking out for me. I’ve learnt that when I am out of balance, I need to heal the separation within myself.

This pathway took me to a whole new level of opening within myself. I thought my heart was open and I’ve learnt that even though it is open, it can open so much wider.

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 12 – Al Muhsi – Assessing What Is

I started this pathway at the beginning of Ramadhan and now feels like a good time to write about it.

“When you are drawn to this pathway, take the opportunity to stop and look through the eyes of Divine clarity at your life as it is right now.”

If this Ramadhan has taught me anything at all, it is mindfulness and being present. A lot of crap has been happening and a lot of good things have been happening too. I’ve been looking at the way I manage myself through these situations.

As someone who suffers from anxiety, this pathway again has taught me acceptance of things as they are now. I’ve said this before but you don’t necessarily have to like what’s happening to accept it. When you reject it, it creates a whirlwind of anxiety and feels overwhelming.

Sometimes you have to cut through the crap of what you want things to be or how you think things should be. At the root of it is what is happening RIGHT NOW and often we look at situations through a different lens. We stay in disappointment when we focus on as we want it to be. Nothing in life is going to be that picture perfect. Every moment is leading you to the next moment and everything is temporary and transitory. It’s very much what you choose to believe that has an impact on hardening or softening your anxiety.

The perfection is in this present moment. Accepting what IS can be really challenging because it involves surrendering. This is the ego as it starts to fall away. The ego is what you believe to be true and when that goes, parts of your identity start falling away with it. I could go a whole lot deeper with this idea, but I will save this for another post! Suffice to say that we are working with what we believe to be true in so many ways and the way we assess “what is” has a lot to do with what we believe to be true. It is always laced with judgement about our current situation.

It’s amazing how much stress falls away when you bring your mind to what is happening right now as if that is all there is. It is one of those things that you have to keep reminding yourself of. One of the things that I have been doing that has really helped me this Ramadhan is to try and be in this state of continuous dialogue with my Creator.

It helps because it means that you are talking to your Creator as if you are talking to yourself which makes you more conscious of the things that you are saying. It means that you can continuously ask for the help that you need in every moment. It also means that you can spend a lot more time in the here and now. When the worries come up, you can ask for help with them and then go back to noticing what is around you and expressing gratitude for it. It alleviates a great deal of stress for me!

It’s funny but what prompted me to write this post makes me chuckle now. I’m sat at Bru on my laptop as I write this. I’m waiting on a call from the garage because I took my car in for a service this morning. They’ve called me once already to tell me there’s work to be done and it’s going to cost me more than I thought. I felt a slight panic as I don’t actually have the money for it. That’s what credit cards are for and I’m grateful that I can defer payment but as the time comes closer to paying that bill, I can see the panic setting in. So as always, I have asked God to find me a way and holding on to that Golden Thread because everything happens for a reason.

Now, in this moment, I have two choices. I can either worry that I won’t have the money or I can trust that it will come from somewhere. I know what happens when I go in to worry. It means that I am not being present and I can get taken off on a tangent. The other option is to stay in the moment and focus on what I am doing right now which is to keep writing this post. Keep writing and just not think about something that hasn’t happened yet.

Now I know how my mind works and I will be back and forth from this thought about how I’m going to pay that bill but if I allow it to distract and then consume me, I am not going to be able to focus on getting anything done. Do you see how it works?

I have to accept that it has happened for a reason and use it to keep me focused on what I am doing. That is the clarity that this pathway talks about. It is clarity about my purpose. There’s something very magical about this present moment. It is a state of empowerment and clarity. It is a place of self-mastery. It’s understanding that you can deliver your purpose and all you need to do is stay focused on the actions that will help you to do this. I know for a fact that is all I need to do. Everything else is taken care of. Sustenance and provision is something that comes from that same Source. Creator provides. One way or another, I know it’ll be taken care of and so when I think of it like that, the worry begins to melt away.

Life is one of those things that is unpredictable. That’s a given. There is always uncertainty and that’s a given. However, if we embrace it and see where it takes us, it can feel expansive and exciting. If we worry, our energy contracts and we can’t see past the end of our own noses.

Life as it is right now.

What does that mean? It means looking around for things to appreciate. It means being thankful that the help is there. One of the big things for me working with this pathway is being able to see that some things happen so that other things can happen. We don’t always realise at the time, but what will happen for us in the future is dependent on what is happening now.

So if I look at this bill, perhaps this is what will create abundance for me. I know it’s money going out, but it is an opportunity to keep wealth circulating and by doing that I have contributed to the way the world goes round.

Everything is a dependency. I may be a speck in the grand design of this Universe, but I am a deliberately designed speck with a purpose. If we focus inward, we can create a sense of inner stability that we ride on when there is nothing certain in outer world. It is knowing that we are part of something greater and that there are other things that are dependent on us. Therein we do not exist in isolation, even when the world’s problems are beating down on us and it doesn’t feel like there is a way out. What happens next is dependent on this present moment.

Cultivating inner stability allows you to grow and change. I know even a year ago, this bill would have pushed me over the edge. It comes down to our outlook and belief that things are always getting better for us. Whatever is sent for us is good for us. This is an opportunity to trust in abundance even if things don’t look the way I want them to look right now. At least I have a car that is roadworthy and it’ll keep me safe.

ENABLING yourself with these beliefs is the way to create the way you want to be feeling right now. The way you feel is what creates the next thing. That is Law of Attraction in a nutshell.

If you can look around and be happy with what you have and be in acceptance of all of it, it helps. It is understanding that as you look around, everything is already changing because everything is temporary. Sometimes, it can feel as though nothing is really happening but life and the whole Universe is in continuous motion. When I think about this, it blows my mind. You can sit still and watch the whole Universe moving around you know that you too are moving even if you don’t feel it. It’s crazy!

I’ll conclude this pathway by asking you to take a moment today to sit still and notice at how much has moved for you. Think about the things you can’t see and the things that you can. Understand that you are in constant motion. Take a breath and allow yourself to catch up with THIS present moment.

Let me know how it feels!

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 11 – Al-Musawir – Designing and Training

 

Now this pathway I found really interesting for where I am in my life. I have just been away to Istanbul. My second visit to what I consider in many ways to be a spiritual home.

I was called the first time, and fortunate enough to be called again. The first trip triggered a long process of cleansing and clearing, and those experiences led me to where I am at now. All the good, the bad and the ugly that needed to be raised to make me who I am was as a result of that trip and I’m certainly grateful for it. Although at the time, I had no idea that it would be the catalyst for such massive change.

I feel as if everything that I had asked for on that first trip had been achieved so going back felt like closure in a way. A feeling of peace and gratitude, but also space to shape the next phase of my life.

This pathway gave me just that. It is about shaping our lives, but also allowing ourselves to be shaped through our experiences. It highlights that the Divine shapes and moulds us in to what we are through our experiences and that process is one of continuous evolution.

For me, this pathway made me think again about who I want to be. I felt like I have grown in to the person I wanted to be, but sometimes when that process is complete, there is a void to fill.  The pathway shows us that we are being moulded and kneaded in to shape all of the time. This can either feel like we want to escape life or embrace it – and it very much depends on how much we are able to surrender to the process.

While I was away, I had some magical experiences and moments of insight and wisdom. You know when you cross paths with strangers and the words exchanged are just what you needed to hear and the answer is clear? Those sorts of experiences that I will cherish and never forget. Accidental happenings that answered the questions I was seeking answers to.

Practicing this pathway made me realise that the route to getting here was a long journey of many steps, yet I was feeling so impatient about knowing the answers and for me, it showed me that the answers keep revealing themselves. Sometimes you just have to relax and it becomes crystal clear.

The first stage is this concept of surrendering and accepting that I do not know best. It’s funny that when you allow yourself to be guided, everything becomes a message from the Divine and you can feel your heart talking to you and leading you to where you need to be. For me, surrender has always been challenging and I am still working on it. I noticed pretty much straight away how much expectation plays a role in my suffering and sense of control. Surrender means acceptance of everything, good and bad and saying I am happy with this. I thought I had this down, but exploring this pathway made me see my inner control freak in full blown technicolour. It also made me look at my Ego in a different way, and helped me to see aspects of my shadow that I had been avoiding looking at.

This places control in a different light in that we try so hard to avoid confronting the shadow aspects of ourselves. We feel guilt and shame for feeling the way we feel about certain things, and this is something that we hold. Using this pathway, surrendering those feelings simply by acknowledging that they were present within me gave me a sense of peace. It also gave me permission not to be in control, and a realisation that I could experience this shadow aspect without causing any harm to anyone else.

I think as human beings, we have an idea of what a “good” person should or should not think or do and when we have emotions that conflict with this, it becomes difficult to deal with because we feel like it makes us a bad person and it is shameful. Through this pathway, I felt like I was learning all over again to be responsible for everything I was feeling and to really own it. It is difficult to own your Ego and overcome shadow feelings. Sometimes we feel bitterness, resentment, irritation, anger, impatience, envy, rejection, sadness, misery but we think we can not feel it fully because it has an impact on the people around us. Sure, people may notice that you are not yourself, but you can not harm them with what you are feeling. You only harm yourself by not honestly facing what is there.

This pathway about designing and training is about living honestly and understanding the contrast that the shadow aspects of yourself allow you to see. By avoiding the shadow, there is a clear message that these are emotions you do not want to feel. This resistance is also a resistance to allowing the Divine to shape you. It contradicts acceptance and surrender to all things that are bestowed on you, regardless of how it all feels to you.

By knowing what you don’t want, ultimately you understand what you do want. I felt like the counter emotion to all these shadow aspects I was discovering is Love. When I asked myself, “How do I want to redesign my life?” the answer is with Love. To work through your shadows, you need Love. To ensure your reality feels good to you, you need Love. To surrender, you need Love.

The pathway is about continuous evolution and the way Creator changes us over time, and in our darkest moments we forget that even that is out of Love. This whole process of being human with all it’s intricacies is made easier with Love.

I remember how it used to be before I came to this path. I always used to think “Why me?” when I recalled all the moments of darkness, all the painful experiences, all the suffering I felt I had to go through. It all makes perfect sense though when I think about it because I needed to go through all that to be here doing this. You never grasp it at the time, but there are some experiences that are absolutely necessary as without them, you can not appreciate the fullness of your gifts here on Earth.

Finally, for me this pathway was very much about getting out of my own way and almost disappearing to allow the life force to work on moulding me. The trouble with the human mind is that it always has an opinion on what is happening! This pathway has taught me neutrality in it’s purest sense and given me a sense of curiosity. It taught me that I can set an intention and ask for something and it will be received. However, the way I receive it and the timing are not things I have any control over. It allowed me to pose the question, “What happens if I do nothing?” and I was finding clear guidance and signs and synchronicities as a result. It gave me confirmation that there are signs, and the path is lit up, but we are so caught up in trying to control and mould our own lives that we forget that there is a bigger picture. This higher plan will play out regardless of whether we do or we don’t.

From this, I took away something very important and that is the feeling of peace that comes with accepting the good and the bad and being happy with all emotions. Although we may not entirely be convinced that what happens to us is for the best, if we can see that it isn’t the end point and take the lessons that it brings, it gives us peace. Where my Ego would say that’s passive, it makes sense to just drop it and get out of my own way by saying, “Yes ok – thank you because I know this is leading me somewhere.” The critical learning is that in that moment of GRRRR – it isn’t the end point yet your ego will make you feel like it is. Continuous motion, continuous learning and continuous evolution. If you grasp this, life becomes something very different and the joy comes back. It is, in itself, a way of connecting and staying connected through the pain.

When you reject a situation, you become separated and disconnected from Source and it feels that there is no help and support. Why would Creator do this to you? As Rumi said, “The cure is in the pain.” In actual fact, it is an opportunity for you to accept and be the closest that you can be to Creator. Those painful emotions are a way of bringing you closer to the Truth but it is only through facing those shadows that we get there.

The pathway recommends that we get a feel for the design of our lives even if all the steps are not clear yet. It also suggests that we look at what’s going on inside us with love and discipline to clear and dissolve. It shows us that there isn’t an end point. Nothing is good and nothing is bad. It is all purely experience that shapes us.

It may not make sense at the time, but it will one day. For me, it is stepping back and allowing these experiences to support personal perfection, learning and growth. It is not judging the feelings and experiences and it is understanding that Love changes and moulds everything.

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 10-Al-Muqtadir – Embodying Power in Action

This is an interesting pathway and it found me on a day where I received some very deep and sincere messages of thanks and praise from clients. I’d read this pathway in the morning, and simply it’s reading was enough to echo within me when I received the messages. I was reminded of the Tao Te Ching where Lao Tzu says, “Once the work is done, it is forgotten.” And the significance of remaining humble in the face of praise.

This pathway talks of the role of the spiritual guide, and also the idea of being unassuming with the use of our power. It first explains through a story that spiritual guides sort of come in, use their power to help a situation and then leave as quickly as they entered the picture not stopping for thanks. I loved this analogy because it resonated very deeply for me. I love this way of working because it allows me not to get distracted by what people think – whether it’s good or it’s bad makes no difference. You go in, do the work, get out and move on the next person. Best way really to stop your ego getting in the way of the work.

The pathway then talks about the Author’s experience of someone who was a great example of this unassuming power. The person in question, “expresses an example of divine power in action, without spotlight or publicity.” This was a very learned and spiritual man that he talks about, and by speaking to him you would never know it. He came across as just a regular guy. I love this because that’s how personal spirituality is and maintaining it this way for me is inspiring.

When you do “Spiritual” work I think there is almost a stereotype of what a “spiritual” person should be like. If you know me, you know I don’t go in for all that claptrap because I think firstly that you should be yourself (warts and all) and secondly, it’s such a personal thing! I think it’s very easy to make assumptions about what a person should eat, pray, live like in this field of work, but at the end of the day, we are all human. And the more human you are, the more it matters in this work. It’s one of the reasons I veer away from spiritual communities as such because I believe in being peers and not in a hierarchy.

I started thinking about the role of the Teacher or Guide in all of this. After all, that’s sort of how I see myself although I’m not entirely comfortable with the labels and the titles. I’ve come across many teachers and guides. Some good, some bad – My view is that it is all experience where at the time I did judge it this way. I wrote a piece a while back on the importance of taking what resonates with you rather than allowing yourself to be led on a merry dance by a guru. I tread cautiously in this field and feel like I’m exposing vulnerability in saying this to you, but to acknowledge you have influence is humbling and to be honest, overwhelming.  I remember when I first started writing this blog and I had no idea who was reading it. I did it purely for myself and even now when I write, it is purely for myself but I’m conscious that you take in what I say which is why it comes with the health warning! You’re not going to agree with everything and that’s cool. We may outgrow each other and that’s cool.

HOWEVER! You know when someone points a camera at you and says, “just act natural”…? Well, I liken my experience to this. I am aware now that people are reading and that really pushes me to remain in authenticity and I think that’s a good thing. I could quite easily spout shit about how perfect I am and how my life is so wonderful, but it isn’t about that. As well as being a teacher, I am also a student of life. Sure I have life credibility and wisdom, but I still have so much to learn and I am still finding my voice.

I think when you first get in to this kind of work, you feel as if you are sacrificing a great deal in order to “save humanity”. I certainly used to feel this way, but this is all ego based and sort of playing the martyr and wanting recognition for the work. When you’ve been doing this work for a while, you begin to understand that it really isn’t about the appreiciation or the praise. It isn’t about being validated in this way. Neither is it about the criticism or fear of being different. Those are all things that are external to you and take away from the real reason why you do what you do.

The reason why I do this work is because it is an expression of the beautiful gifts our Creator has bestowed upon me. I feel that the situations I’ve experienced were placed in my path and the choices I made led naturally to this work. The beautiful by product of expression is the ability to help people simply by that gift flowing through me. It all sounds so perfect and wonderful, right?

Of course I can say that now! At the end of the day, we are all human and human beings have a need to be needed because it gives us a sense of belonging.

If you’ve come across this by Rumi, then you’ll understand perfectly.

“Knock, And He’ll open the door
Vanish, And He’ll make you shine like the sun
Fall, And He’ll raise you to the heavens
Become nothing, And He’ll turn you into everything.”

Essentially, for me this pathway is about surrendering your ego. I think this can be challenging sometimes because the human in us really wants to take credit for the feats that we’ve accomplished. That’s ok and we need to be aware when this is happening. When all is said and done, we are an expression of the Divine energy. It moves through us and it is surely through it’s grace that we are able to influence positive change in others. It is this energy that is expressing through us and our work. It’s beautiful but being the flawed humans we are, we have a tendency to get in our own way when it comes simply allowing it to flow. There’s ego’s to battle, and fear to overcome, and all sorts of healing interspersed between the moments of pure magic. It would be boring if it wasn’t this way!

This growth comes in the form of our nature, our character, our actions, our words, our behaviour. The way we carry ourselves is all important, and humility is sacred. It isn’t about playing small, because you have the greatest force moving through you. It’s recognising it’s the force and your ego has an influence on how you use the power you’ve been given. I learnt this early on in my career and with power comes responsibility. And we can only be responsible for ourselves.

They say empty cages rattle the loudest. I remember in the early days of running my business, I was at a mind, body, spirit fair. I’d just qualified as a Reiki practitioner and was there talking to people about Reiki. I love meeting and chatting to new people so I was going round talking to the other stall holders, as you do.

I met this woman on a stand who was a healer and Reiki Master. Having recently qualified and being as enthusiastic about energy healing as I am, I could feel my hands tingling. So I said to her, “My hands are starting to tingle.” Her response was one that made me realise the importance of humility early on in my career.

She said, “Yes. It’s because I’m extremely powerful.”

Erm…right. That floored me and I didn’t really know what to do with it. All I knew was that it made me feel uncomfortable and awkward, and didn’t leave me better than it found me. I’m sure she was powerful, but I remembered this incident when reading through this pathway. The Power isn’t something that belongs to us, and so is never taken for granted. It’s a blessing that it flows through us. It isn’t something that needs to be announced to others. It isn’t something to be proven or imposed upon others. It resides in all of us. It makes me uncomfortable to a degree when attention is drawn to it. Balancing this acknowledgement of what you’re capable of with and surrendering your ego is where it’s at for me. In Sufism it is called Nafs, and this is the first battle.

“When we find ourselves in situations involving healing or another outward, obvious use of power, others can project the archetype of hero or heroine on to us. If we accept this, it is a big step towards forgetfulness.”

It isn’t that we are not accepting of praise. It is more the acknowledgement that we would not have this were it not for the grace of God. Regardless of whether it is praise or criticism we receive, it should not affect us. On a personal level, I find it really challenging when people are singing my praises because from a young age I was always taught that all praise is to the Divine. That, and I struggled with self-worth for a long time and so of course that’s a comfortable idea to me!

As we work on self-worth and acknowledgement of who we are and the gifts we bring with us to this world, we learn to accept praise so that we know our value and our contribution. We surrender our ego and remain in gratitude that this power has been bestowed upon us. We humble ourselves in that we recognise that we will always be learning how to use it. We work on healing ourselves so that we can be the purest channel for that beautiful energy and we focus on our intention simply being the expression of our true selves for the highest benefit of all we encounter, including ourselves.

When I teach, I make it really clear that we as healers are not doing anything at all. We are simply observing the power at work through intention. The intention is always for the highest benefit of the person we are working with. It has nothing to do with us. We place our trust in the energy, in Source and know that the power of this is greater than anything we can do as human beings or even spiritual beings.

I love this pathway as it serves as a reminder that “We are as the flute and the Music in us comes from Thee.” Rumi, again!

99 Pathways of the Heart, Healing

Pathway 9 – Al-Qadir – Holding the Center

So some of you may be aware that I’ve started writing regularly on the Ascension energies and as I’m beginning to really commit to living that experience and sharing what I’m finding, these pathways seem to be another way in which the road is being lit up for me. Holding the Center for me is about how I hold my own energy whilst feeling everything inside and outside of me. It’s about knowing that there is a constant for me and that constant is Creator.

As humanity evolves, we experience changes. We are connected to everything, and everything is connected to us. As the world changes, we are required to strengthen from the inside out in order to play our part in supporting the evolution of this great planet that we are on.

Ascension, the way I see it, is the growth and purification of your soul. All souls are experiencing growth and purification in this physical realm. This comes to us as life experiences, emotions and connectedness. We are all at different points on the same trajectory and as our awareness grows, we expand. We become aware of this energy that we are and we begin to take responsibility to consciously experience this expansion, whatever it brings. We know that we are more than just a body. We are a soul travelling, experiencing this reality physically in order to grow, learn and purify. As we awaken and become more aware, this process is one that we willingly and deliberately undertake. We become conscious of what is happening and become curious as to how. We don’t begrudge feeling it because we know that it is part of our spiritual path. There’s millions of people across the planet all experiencing similar themes and evolutions and so for me, it confirms that we are connected and that collectively we are moving through the different energetic stages required for our transition in to the next life.

My belief is that the soul has lived for eons before the physical body has. It has it’s own route map and contains the blueprint for this physical life. This connection with your own soul allows you draw down the information you need for this physical realm. Some of it we’re aware of and some of it we are not. We have our own individual blueprint, but we also have the greater blueprint which is for the collective. This is why when we are ascending, we will be dealing with our own issues as well as dealing with collective issues. I could write a whole book on this so bear with. If you are interested, there’s a few people I can recommend that you follow. Vaz Sriharan and Amanda Lorence are the key people I follow because they are genuine, authentic and what they say resonates. Find who feels right for you.

I’m really starting to feel a real connection and synchronicity between choosing to explore these pathways and the Ascension energies that I am experiencing. It feels that every time I reach for a pathway, it corresponds with what I’m feeling energy wise with this collective ascension as well as on a personal level. It’s curious, and interesting and I wonder if it will always be this way or whether it is coincidental. I do believe that there are no coincidences though, so only time will tell. It all seems to be fitting really well together for the moment, so it’ll be interesting to see where this goes!

Moving in to this pathway, it talks about “power” and this power is different from life force energy in that it “actively changes manifested reality.” Again, I feel great resonance and power with this because it is active exploration of the pathways that is supporting my evolution on a very practical level. This isn’t something I am doing necessarily on purpose. Creator is at work in all things and when you see everything as a manifestation of Creator at work, it allows you to move with the flow and with more ease of action. You feel as if you are being directed towards your path and you feel lightness and speed when you act. Maybe that’s Divine inspiration. All I know is that the actions that are Destiny Driven feel effortless. The heaviness is not felt so much with these actions and so this creates joy.

It’s funny because I still stand by what I’ve said about not really knowing where this is all going. None of that even matters. I do what feels good for me to do and it leads me to the next thing. When I listen, I am guided and very much driven deeper in to this path. It is the joy of exploration rather than having any expectation of any outcomes. This is a very different experience to the resistance from the past. I feel as if I am beginning to understand what it’s all about and the key is the learning. Yes, sometimes you do need to move through the heaviness, but even that is a gift from Creator. You learn to feel the difference between that Power at work your own forging of the path. It’s just a knowing and a drive to do something, even when you feel terrified. There’s a power that’s taking you through it, pulling you through.

As you read the pathway, it tells the story of a Dervish who was out one day observing nature and could see how Creator provides for each living creature. He resolves to go home and wait because surely the Creator will provide. This waiting comes to nothing, and he realises that it is action that activates the power of Creator to provide.

This ties in to this idea of expectations. We have an expectation or a feeling, and then it doesn’t transpire. Action is the key ingredient to being able to see this power in action. The same applies to manifesting in the physical form. Without action, there is no direction. There is no activation of this Power energy. This is something that I am learning in so many ways. My own healing sessions have brought up this energy strongly, and everything that I am learning and doing reinforces this idea of acting on what feels right rather than waiting for something to be revealed.

Expectation can be challenging as it takes us out of the learning and in to an idea of how something may appear to us. As we know, nothing in life is like this and so when we focus on wholeheartedly committing to the action, without any expectation of where it will lead, we suddenly open up this space of acceptance of all possible outcomes. There’s something quite magical about that revelation for me. It is about doing for the sake of doing, for the love of doing and for the joy of doing. There is no transaction here as there is no expectation. This has it’s own rewards and as you experience this pathway you’ll learn that there is so much to be gained from this realisation.

The human mind will always have an attachment to outcome and sees everything as transaction or exchange. The trick is to focus on the joy and the love of what we do with no expectation. That is how we direct the powerful force and see it at work for us.

“In all cases, this pathway helps us to remember that it is really the One Being working through us that accomplishes what needs to be done.”