Energy Updates

Ascension Energy Update 18th February, 2019

This is your ascension energy update for this week and oh my does it feel like the ground is moving from under our feet! Before I begin this update, I just want to say that my updates are NOT astrological. They’re purely based on tuning in to the frequencies. I include what I know may be happening with the moon and planets if it’s relevant. Mostly, I’m sharing what I’m experiencing as well as collective themes that emerge from the healing room that are tied in to these themes.

I’ve not done an update for a while as I’ve been processing this very heavy energy that’s around. Those of you who follow my Facebook posts know that I’ve been keeping an eye on the Schumann Resonance. Check out this link: https://www.disclosurenews.it/en/schumann-resonance-today-update/

The spikes have been noticeable as the frequency rises and I’ve been feeling it all quite physically. It’s worth checking out if you’re feeling a bit odd and wondering what it is that’s setting you off!

Energy wise, as always, there’s a lot going on. Although the last few weeks have felt quite still and stagnant. There’s been a feeling of “nothing seems to be happening.” Hold on tight because the energy is taking us higher and higher.

There’s a full moon Tuesday 19th and the energy is building around that. It doesn’t feel as intense as previous moons. With full moon energy, usually the shit that needs to clear comes up and hits you square in the face. This moon has a gentler energy. It’s calmer and it feels like a real magnetic pull towards something bigger.

One of themes we’ve been exploring in the healing room has been growth. Growth happens on a number of levels. Emotional and spiritual growth is what I support people with. It’s been noticeable just how much people are starting to become aware of energy and it’s impact on daily life. I’ve been doing this kind of work for the last 5 years and I’m really seeing the landscape changing in terms of awareness and expansion on a spiritual level. Everyone knows about energy – regardless of whether they believe in it or not. It’s becoming a mainstream thing to talk about energy and that can only be a good thing.

This weeks energy is about expansion and I feel that really strongly. The thing to remember about expansion is that when it’s happening, the first thing we do is resist. This makes us contract (not expand) and there’s a certain amount of pressure that falls on us in order for us to get to a point where we burst forth from it. I’ve certainly been feeling this way over the last week or so. It’s tough to remember when you’re going through it that the time you feel pressure is the bit that’s going to make you grow and expand.

Times like these are perfect to show you what you’re made of!

Another theme in the healing room has been around asking for what you need. Whether that’s setting boundaries, asking for help or just being able to take time out. We seem to be learning some really big lessons around that. This week’s energy is asking us to choose wisely and to include ourselves in our choices.

We are inextricably linked to the past but we forget that we are also linked equally as strongly to our future. The present is where these timelines meet and that is something to be really conscious and aware of as we are manifesting our future. We can do this consciously or unconsciously but simply to be aware of it seems to be a big message from the universe.

I don’t know where you’re at but I seem to be doing a lot of watching. I’m observing myself. I’m observing others. I’m also finding that a lot of the questions I’m asking seem to be answered through this observation. I love this way of working because I’ll reach out to the Universe and say “show me.” This is even more awesome if you remember that you’ve asked because being human, we often forget and then when the shits hitting the fan, we wonder what hell we’ve unleashed! I’ve started getting in to more of a conscious habit with the words, “show me regardless of whether I like the truth or not” and then I let go. This is the critical bit because you really do have to accept what comes rather than influence the outcome!

The pull from the moon is a big one and there’s something very reassuring about this moon’s energy. I’m feeling a different vibration with this one. It’s almost like the energy of “home” wants to come in and sit with us. I like this feeling. For those of you who are on this path, you’ll know I’ve talked about this feeling before. This feeling of wanting to go home. I feel the energies of this place are with us. I can’t sense whether it is galactic star energy or whether the energy of the ancestors is coming through more strongly with this moon. It’s a nice feeling this glow though because either way, the message I’m getting is “You are not alone. There are many more out there like you.”

For me, this moon is significant as I turn 40 in a few days. They say life begins at 40 so perhaps I’m also feeling the energy of my own rebirth from this star flooded universe. Who knows?

If you need help with any of the themes in this post, please do get in touch.

Until next time….Love and Light,

Hafsa

Energy Updates

Ascension Energy Update 30th November 2018

This is your ascension energy update for the week. It’s been a little messy since the full moon, hasn’t it?!

Many of us are finding that the lessons are coming in thick and fast and with Mercury has been in retrograde since November 16th. It goes direct around the time of the new moon on the 7th December and there’s refreshing changes on the way. Well that’s the least we can hope for.

Expect between now and then to be messy. There is much coming up to heal and one of the things that will really hit you is that one same lesson that you’ve still not learnt. I know I’m feeling it in many areas of my life at the moment and it really is time to gather your wits about you!

The best way to handle it is to take that time out for yourself. Reflect. I mean really reflect and ask yourself what are the things that you keep experiencing time and time again. There’s your big clue. Whether it’s feeling hard done by or whether it’s a feeling of stop/start – just take time to sit with it.

The next step is to ask yourself, “What am I doing that’s keeping it the same?” Therein lie a lot of the answers.

Remember there are some things that are programmed in as subconscious patterns and so they’re not that easy to shift on your own. If you want to give me a call, I’d be happy to help you with this.

Think about what you want to do differently. I can’t remember who it was that said that it’s an act of madness to do the same thing again and again and expect a different result. It might have been Einstein but he was right.

It is really heavy right now but it’s all about getting us to take a real good look at where we have come from and how we want to change. Mars, the planet of action, is also on the move so this will make it easier.

I would say take some time to reflect. Sometimes we can want change so badly but the actions that we are taking really aren’t in alignment with what we want to achieve. It’s time to work it all out so that when you do take action, it’s with intention and is fruitful for you.

I know my own personal way of doing things is haphazard and so sitting down and working things out is something I’m not used to doing. I kind of follow my heart on a whim and a prayer and structure and discipline are completely alien concepts to me. This wave of ascension energy has really forced me to slow down, take stock and plan.

My challenge now is trying to stick to the plan!

One thing I do know is that this year has been start/stop energy for many of us. It has brought up so much for us to heal and I know that many of you are going through a messy time right now.

I’ve been doing my own Emotion Code sessions to help me shift out of these old patterns because I know it isn’t me that doesn’t want to take action – it’s my subconscious hindering me. As a result, I’m noticing the changes in myself on a massive scale. I think those of you who have been following my social media have also noticed how much I’m changing.

It’s important that we tune in and believe that we are not hopeless in our endeavours. Healing is here to help you. If you’d like to have a chat, please get in touch. A consultation call is completely free.

Click here to book – https://www.fresha.com/providers/15863

Healing, Inspiration

To attract what you truly deserve, you have to feel that you deserve it

To attract what you truly deserve, you have to feel that you deserve it. Lately, I’ve been working to try and reach more people and that’s because I know I can really make a difference. I know there’s more to do and I’ve been trying to get to the bottom of this so I thought I’d share my thinking on this with you.

So I know that I have a real impact on people’s lives. I know that healing has helped make massive leaps for people’s careers. I’ve helped people come back from absolute rock bottom. I know that there’s some clients who literally trust me with their lives. I know that I’ve helped people avoid being on prescription drugs and even helped some people to come off them. I know I’ve helped people become confident and assertive. I know I’ve helped people overcome their fears of intimacy. I know I’ve helped people make sense of their spiritual journey and taught them how to work on themselves. I’ve seen people grow and blossom in front of my eyes. I’ve helped people to take charge of their own destiny and given them the perspective that’s helped them to believe that everything is possible.

The list is endless and you’d think that this would be enough evidence for me to believe in myself, right? Well, I’m going to be really honest here and say that I’ve only just started to understand the difference I make to people’s lives and I’m still battling with this. Empaths start on a much lower self-worth level to others in my opinion and it takes a lot to climb to that place where you truly believe in your gifts.

I had a lovely client come in the other day and something he said will stick with me forever. He said, “You can say that your work is rewarding and real satisfaction and that you make a real difference. People will remember you for what you did for them.” I tried to stay cool, but inside my heart dropped a little because I’d not taken that perspective. I usually just bumble along, shrug off the praise and get on with the job. I hadn’t really been listening or taking on board the nice things that people have said because perhaps I didn’t feel that I truly deserved it. I always focus on what else there is left to do and this made me stop and take stock and really appreciate what I have.

I know that when people tell me how much I’ve helped them with the sessions we’ve had together, I still have a hard time accepting the praise. It’s like I still can’t quite believe that I’m doing this.

It takes an awful lot to step up and accept all of who you are. I’m finding this as I battle my way through it. I talk a lot about working with the shadow aspects, but this is like another form of shadow that we also need to work with. Being able to see and accept what you’re putting in to world and the positives it brings is a beautiful thing. What happens is that we think of this as Ego and retreat in to being humble. I know this is what I’ve been doing and actually as a result, I’m not getting what I truly deserve because I don’t truly believe I deserve it.

This is one of the things that I’m trying to set about changing in myself because it’s part of my self-sabotage pattern and I know I’m fed up of living that pattern. In my bones, I feel that it’s time to step up and really be visible about the work that I do. I’m building my confidence. I’m getting better at accepting praise and I’m really listening and allowing the evidence to show me that this journey is well worth the graft. Look at what I can do – it’s magical but in the daily grind, the magic gets lost and forgotten. I want to be the person that still believes in the magic!

It can be overwhelming, but I’m learning that actually praise and kind words are how people are showing love and appreciation. I have to keep my heart open to this love. It doesn’t mean it’s going to my head and it doesn’t make me any less humble. It’s quite a difficult and new concept to me to be able to celebrate the good things that I have put in to the world and be proud of what I have achieved. It’s actually quite scary!

I’m conscious not to take anything for granted because I know where I came from. At the same time, I understand that if I am overwhelmed by it, I’m not in complete acceptance of it. It’s an interesting dilemma because the Ego is shouting “Be humble!” and at the same time you’re at the point where you can’t deny the evidence that’s put before you.

The trick is to define your own sense of identity because there is strength in having that sense of self. The Ego is the false identity and when it screams “Be humble!” at you, it is one of the ways in which it is holding you back and keeping you in the limitations that you’ve been taught.

I never really recognised this fully before now and working with it has been really challenging. I can say in my own mind I believe I make a difference and I’m starting to accept the evidence as real. Remember how deep set the ego ideas and beliefs are.

Defining your own sense of self takes time. I’ve been on this journey a while and I’m still finding false selves and as each mask falls away, it enables me to become more authentic, more real and more confident in my own definition of who I am.

I don’t want to be what I’m taught I have to be in this world. I don’t want to have limitations and restrictions placed on me.

I want to be able to share and celebrate the fullness of who I am. I want to believe that I can attract what I deserve. I want to believe that I truly deserve it.

If any of this resonates and you’re on the path trying to find ways to become who you came here to be, please get in touch with me. I love working with opening hearts and minds to all the possibilities!

 

Energy Updates

Ascension Energy Update 20th November, 2018

Well there’s definitely been a massive shift in the ascension energy since Venus went direct on the 16th November. The thing that I’ve noticed is that all those lessons that we’ve learnt when it comes to relationships are at the forefront of our minds. There is a steely determination in the air and the vibe is centred about not going back to our old ways.

With this energy shift, there have been physical symptoms. For me, the amount of sleep I am needing has increased! The rest is an important part of any energy shift because our soul energy moves a lot faster than our physical mind and body does. We need to physically catch up and as we process, it can make our minds and bodies feel tired.

One thing that I feel strongly is to understand that everyone’s pace is different. I do however get the sense that once we have caught up (however long this takes) the energy will speed up and you’ll find yourself really getting to grips with what needs doing and following through on things that have been sitting for a while.

With this energy, there’s definitely a sense of sifting through and prioritising. I know that this is the energy because it isn’t a process that comes naturally to me. I feel a deep need to really connect in solitude and actually that’s guiding me to what the priorities are at any given time.

The energy is magical at the moment. So many signs and synchronicities. It feels like it has to be this way to get us to believe in the magic again! The energies have been so heavy over the past few months that this is much needed relief for us all.

It’s uplifting even if it making us feel sleepy! I’ve found so much more joy and laughter since the shift happened and this lightness brings with it a renewed hope and optimism.

It really is a magical time and a brilliant time to get things in motion. I know that Mercury is retrograde but I feel that it’s time to plan and put together the vision for the future. It feels like we have moved on from so much after Venus shifted and it has given much needed clarity.

Re-evaluating relationships was the focus of Venus retrograde and it’s beautiful how the lessons learnt are resulting in the way that we approach anything new. There is something cautious and protective in the energy, but at the same time it isn’t coming from a place of fear. It’s coming from heightened intuition and the resistance to learning lessons seems to be subsiding.

There is an openness to this energy and a willingness to welcome whatever emotions are coming to visit. It’s an expansive space and its fast paced. There is a lot of movement and almost like a feeling of whizzing through the air at times.

With Mercury Retrograde, it’s important to pay attention to the details for us to properly harness the energy. If you’re anything like me, you’ll get carried and not take account for the small print! I have to keep reminding myself. Checking in is important and remember not to go too fast with this because there is the potential for burnout.

It is reassuring to know that all is coming to fruition but the message that’s coming through really strongly is that we need to take everything at our own pace. You can’t swallow the entire ocean. You can only take a sip at a time. This energy is setting the tone for what’s to come and so on a practical level, now is the time to think about what you’d like to introduce in to your routine. Whether it’s new ways of thinking, new habits, structure, discipline. This will all be made easier because of the energy that we are in.

The Universe is supporting us to get to where we need to go. Most of the time, it can feel like the Universe is throwing us a curve ball and teaching us the lessons but this energy is lovely because it feels supportive, reassuring and energising in a way that I’ve not experienced to this extent before.

Take advantage of it! Also know that what’s meant for you is on it’s way and regardless of whether you consciously or subconsciously try to sabotage it, it’s all coming for you anyway. You’ll learn what you need to learn through the process but that which you desire is the thing to keep in mind.

Learn to become obsessed with visualising what you’d like this energy to bring you and watch as the Universe meets you and supports you to achieve and realise it. It’s a beautiful feeling to be able to believe in the magic again and I’m really loving what’s happening right now.

Remember when you feel the magic, you resonate that vibration and that vibration has an impact on others. The more you can harness that feeling, the more you are contributing to raising the vibration on this planet. We are all doing that. Even something as simple as being in a good mood or sending out good vibes makes a difference.

I hope you’re making the most of it! I’ve cracked on with more videos as a result of this little boost so if you’d like to take a look CLICK HERE! Get in touch if you’d like to share how you’re feeling about the future!

Until next time,

Love Hafsa

99 Pathways of the Heart

99 Pathways of the Heart – Being an “Old Soul”

Pathway 15 – Al-Muqaddim – Preparing the way

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to acknowledge the part of your being that feels “oldest,” and prepare the way for power to flow through your life.”

So this is the pathway that I have been exploring and it started with a healing transmission that I did at the beginning of November which started a profound shift for me in terms of accessing the oldest parts of my being.

Power is an interesting concept, particularly for me. Since I began on this journey, everything has been about stepping in to my power and continuously I’m finding newer ways to do this. I had some funny ideas about power when I first started on this journey, but as I’ve grown, I’ve come to see it as a positive force in my life.

The pathway really is about delving in to who we are. Our souls were created long before our bodies were and so that part of us has lived and acquired a great deal of wisdom.

One of the things I noticed as soon as I started work with this pathway was the number of references made in relation to me being an “old soul.” The first time I heard that phrase I must have been about 17 and I’d sneaked away to London for the day. I went to Camden Market and was mooching around. I met this guy who looked like an old sage and he was full of love and life. I can still see his face. We ended up chatting for a long while. He caught sight of the palm of my hand and asked if he could have a look. I felt a bit hesitant but I agreed. He told me I was a very old soul but it wouldn’t be later in life until I realised what that meant. I’d completely forgotten about this experience and now that I’m writing about it, it brings it all back for me.

The story came back to me because I’ve only just realised that what he set in motion has resulted in this here today and I believe he knew exactly what he was doing. In this work, I am fortunate enough to be deliberately and consciously setting in motion change for those I work with.

It made me look at how I work with people and what I’m able to access. The pathway drew me to connect even deeper within myself. We spend life trying to define who we are in this world when really who we are sits within our soul. Once we start connecting to that deeper sense, everything in life starts to move around us for us to be able to fully understand and return to that original soul self.

The pathway is about returning back to our original image and this journey here in this world is what creates the means for us to do this. Life teaches us the nature of who we really are on one level. I’m talking about going beyond that. I’m talking about being from a place that you can’t access in a physical way.

For those of you who have read previous blogs, you’ll know that I talk about “going home” and by that I mean that place where we came from that’s before this world or any other world. It always seemed separate from me until I started to understand how to channel it in this world. I have more of a sense of belonging now that I ever have.

The adventure with this pathway was to learn how to go deeper within and I have found that connecting with this idea that I have been this energy for much longer than the 39 years here on earth has had a profound shift in my energy. I understand power on a much deeper level and it really is having an impact on the way I’m choosing to live.

The whole world looks different to me as a result. I’ve always been seeking to find my place here on Earth and each time I find it, I find new levels of understanding it. It’s not possible, I don’t think, to understand your place here unless you also understand where your soul has been.

I’m blessed to be an old soul and it really is becoming a distinct part of who I am. It gives me a uniqueness as a person. It has also made me curious enough to delve deeper. All of this enquiry is for a reason – this I know for certain. Synchronistically with this pathway, I’ve discovered aspects of my ancestry that have helped me to understand my spiritual gifts on a much deeper level. When healing is literally in your blood, you have no choice but to accept that’s who you are. It’s beautiful and it’s taken my sense of belonging to another level which is great for me and for the world!

I think the most amazing aspect of this pathway though is allowing yourself to open up and letting the power of YOU flow through. The more you access this part of yourself, the more you are preparing the way for what’s to come next. One of the beautiful things about this pathway is that it opens you up to wonder. I always talk about potential and fulfilling that potential but this is on a whole other level. It’s like you’ve got back up and support and everything you need. It’s like you are that potential in every moment.

With this pathway being so profound and deep, I’m actually having a challenging time in articulating how it’s making me feel. Suffice to say though that like all the other ways, it is changing me for the better. The closest phrase to describe how I feel is that “I am really coming into my own.” That sort of captures it.

The feelings you get when you’re accessing this are out of this world. Phenomenal. I wish I could tell you how or what to do to get there because everyone needs to feel this. I’m still integrating and working that out but when I have that in a practical form, I will share it. There is a sense of pride that comes from knowing yourself in this way. It isn’t an ego thing, simply a sense of contentment and being sure about who you are. This may not make much sense but if you know, you know.

There is a whole other world and worlds within worlds to discover. Such is the beauty of connecting to yourself, your power, your lineage, your ancestry, and the source of all that power.

“This is love.

To fly toward a secret sky,

to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment.

First to let go of life.

Finally, to take a step without feet.”

Rumi

Energy Updates

11:11 Energy Portal, 2018

If you keep seeing 11:11 and you understand it’s significance, keep reading. November has arrived and it feels like I’ve been waiting for this! It’s a really interesting time. The 11:11 portal has opened. We are now in full blown ascension energy. This wave has activated a new set of energies from within. I’ve certainly felt it and it is a lot deeper than previous waves.

October’s energy was pretty intense. One of the biggest themes was letting go. New Earth. New Me. It was as if we were preparing for something more intense. It has arrived although I don’t quite know what it looks like. I just know that its in the same place as I am.

I was fortunate enough to visit some sacred sights. On Halloween, I was at Avebury Stone Circle and then went on to Glastonbury Tor. It was a sacred and magical experience. Wednesday evening saw massive waves of energy coming in as the portals opened.

I felt quite blessed to be in Glastonbury, at the Heart Chakra of the world and spent quite some time with the energies there to cleanse and clear. I’m still processing everything that happened within on my journey and don’t quite feel ready to share as one piece of writing. There was far too much, but I feel the activations I received will have a major impact on my work.

The energies are driving us forward at the moment. My sense is that November is about clarity in terms of purpose and mission. November is also about being unafraid to change direction. It is about intuition and heart led intelligence. It also feels like it’s about being awake. I mean literally being awake – sometimes all night in my case!

The beauty of intuition is that there is no need for any physical and tangible evidence. When we intuit, it doesn’t matter what’s around us. All that matters is what is within. These energies are showing us that whatever is within us is clearly manifesting outside out us. The thing to grasp with this idea is that you have the power and you are able to drive and direct your reality. Tune in to your higher heart and let it guide you. The energy is making it easier for you to do this. You’ll find you have ideas, hunches and flashes of inspiration and you need to take action. You need follow the call.

As within, so with out is an age old idea that many have written about but there is some certainty and conviction about it’s truth in a completely different way now. It feels as if there is nowhere to hide with the intensity of how the truth is placed at the forefront of our awareness. We have no choice but to follow the signs. It isn’t about looking back at the breadcrumb trail that led you here. It’s about looking ahead to your next destination and lifting your foot to take that step.

Acknowledging the truth that we are seeing now gives us a justification for letting go. It is easier when you can see why you’re doing what you’re doing. The world looks and feels completely different when you are seeking truth. I certainly feel like I’ve been to the opticians and got new glasses because what I am seeing around me appears completely different. It is like we are being installed with a completely new operating system. I feel like the old one has been wiped out.

I feel very much that I am feeling my way through a new way of being. People I know are feeling like complete strangers to me at the moment and it is disorientating but I can feel that something is definitely changing. I’ve often said that this world is a simulation. It is a way of experiencing your true nature and delivering your soul’s mission in a physical way so that you understand the wholeness of being. This simulation is likened to the Matrix and I’m definitely feeling that analogy with these energies.

This is a time of massive energy shifts and it is important to harness this and use it to drive you forward. Seek clarity on your purpose and mission by simply asking for it. There are so many signs if you’re looking. The sky tells you stories. Nature gives you messages. Pay attention to what is happening around you and stay open to change course at any moment.

Yes it is disorientating but don’t let that phase you. It feels like a very special time and learning to harness the energy and allowing it to direct you feels like the right thing to do. It feels like this update has been a bit of a mish mash of ideas with no coherence but that tells you a lot about what’s going on! I’m still processing, but I wanted to get something out because it may help some of you.

 

99 Pathways of the Heart

99 Pathways of the Heart – Maintaining and nourishing yourself

“When you are guided to this pathway, take the opportunity to feel a very steady yet powerful state of awareness in your being that maintains and nourishes you and others.”

This is the pathway that I’ve been reflecting on this past week and it is one that presents plenty of challenges for me. Embodying a steady state is something that I have been working on for as far as I can remember. For me, there is a juxtaposition here with being a free spirit.

This pathway requires pulling yourself inwards whilst you experience life. Being a free spirit, it’s easy for my heart to be called elsewhere. I want to talk about this because for me it is one the most challenging aspects of who I am as a person. This is where the conflict lies and I’m noticing that it is how my power escapes sometimes.

I know I have this immense reservoir of love within me and the capacity to nourish and give to others. This pathway takes me further in to using this source to help maintain myself and it is this very thing that I have been trying to do for a long time. This pathway has helped me to uncover a whole other level and given me an awareness and perspective that goes deeper.

For those of us that are empathic, it’s very easy to relegate our own needs in order to serve others. We think that this is why we came here – to serve. That’s part of it but not the whole of it.

This pathway really made me look at the way I give and the expectations that I have created from others around me. When I began to pull it back and go within, what struck me is how very little I have given myself. With a reservoir so large, it’s almost as if I think can survive on a lot less from the pot so rather than taking from it, I put in to it. This brings up feelings of guilt and feeling selfish. At the same time, I look around me and notice that perhaps I feel this more because of the belief that I came here to serve. There are deep set emotions here about worthiness attached to this and whether I deserve to take when I can give so much. It became obvious to me that there was very little balance in my life when it came to this.

It’s been a really challenging week and working with this pathway has actually made me feel really sad. I have to be raw and honest about how I feel. That’s what this space is for and it needs to be expressed.

The pathway also reminds me that I must not overextend myself. This is what occurred to me and I can see clearly where I am doing this. I can blame being an empath to some extent but the truth of it is that I have plenty of fleeting whims and distractions all created by my ego to prevent me from embodying this state. I can see that very clearly. I realised that I can’t hide behind anything anymore. Especially not when it has been shown to me this clearly. When you realise how little you have given yourself, it brings up anger and resentment and I’ve had to spend a lot of time working with this. I’ve allowed this and I forgive myself. I can change and that is what I am doing. Easy statements to make but if you’ve ever gone through this, you’ll know the raw emotion it brings up.

This idea of sacrifice comes with this type work and it’s something that keeps coming up for me to clear away. The idea that being in service should be at the expense of your own self simply isn’t true. I am entitled to a life just like everyone else. There’s a paradox here as the “service” is actually what I have chosen to do. It’s my own path I’m creating so it is as much for me as it is for humanity. The ego makes you choose one or the other and we are conditioned to believe that choosing service to others is the better thing to do. In actual fact, we can have both but it takes a lot of unlearning which I am still learning to do.

When I call the ego out on this, the contradictions are so very obvious. There is so much pain in saying goodbye to old ways of being. I’ve always tried to be conscious of what my ego is doing and exploring the pathways has brought up a lot of wounds that need to be healed within myself.

It isn’t easy getting the balance within yourself between serving others and serving yourself. We are brought up with conditioning that tells us that putting ourselves first is selfish. We’re taught a linear way of thinking that suggests that if we think about ourselves first, it means that we don’t care about others. It’s difficult to shift to a way of thinking that enables you to be equal to others and there’s a perception that to consider yourself equal equates to being egotistical. It gets really complicated because you can think this logically in your head but when the feelings of guilt show themselves, your heart gets pulled straight back. This is what I’m grappling with.

I’m always banging on about self-worth and I’m a work in progress but what I am learning here has come at a critical time for me. My life is interesting because of the demanding nature of my work. I get phone calls and text messages all the time asking me all sorts of things. I’ve always felt the need to answer and help and I don’t regret helping. I do sometimes resent the demands and that’s me being really honest. I take full responsibility for this now where in the past I’d have blamed others. I’ve created and met these expectations without even thinking about it and it’s difficult to undo without experiencing emotional turmoil. Meeting demands is what I’ve been looking at taking a step back from because there is a line where my work ends and I begin and that can get blurred very easily. Even though boundaries have been set, a plea for help is a plea for help and my heart isn’t one that can ignore it easily. So it’s been an emotional time because for each time that has happened, I’ve had to ask myself who I am putting first. I’m learning to deal with the emotion that comes with it and I can tell you it isn’t easy but it is necessary. This is a spiritual lesson that needs to be learned.

A strong feeling of discomfort comes from taking a step back. It’s like going against what your heart is telling you when you don’t reply to a plea for help but I had to explore this feeling for myself. It feels as if people are relying on me. It feels that there is an urgency for them that I am ignoring and that somehow makes me a bad person. Again, this linear way of thinking is one I’m learning to undo because a lot of that conditioning simply isn’t true.

What I have realised with this pathway is that I go deep and I do have a lot to give. My priority has become to maintain that within myself. Embodying a steady state of awareness and power is important but I didn’t realise how important it was for maintaining and nourishing myself. I thought I was doing that and I know now that I am not doing enough of it. The reason for this is the raw emotion, the guilt, the anger, the feeling selfish that I’m still learning to overcome. And all this just to feel equal to others! It’s mind blowing because I thought I was overcoming myself in terms of self-worth but there’s always more I need to be shown and more I need to do.

It’s interesting because although I do take a lot of time for myself and I switch off when I have to, I’ve developed some sticky habits when it comes to work. It’s the belief that work overrides everything because of it’s nature. It doesn’t though. What overrides everything is my state of being and my ability to maintain and nourish myself and I’m starting to look at that as often as I can in response to meeting the worlds demands on me. I’m taking it one moment at a time and seeing how it feels to choose me.

Just when you think you’ve got the self-worth thing down, the universe throws you a massive curve ball. With things changing as rapidly as they are, this is a very valuable lesson that the universe is giving me. I’ve noticed how quickly it can become about everything else. I’ve noticed how my free spirit slips away under the mask of empathy.

Old beliefs and old habits are dying hard. I’m working hard on taking the shame out of “I’m putting myself first.” It’s one I think a lot of us can relate to. If nice people finish last, I’m not ok with that and so I’m determined to prove that wrong.

I am just as important as everyone else and I’m determined not to forget it!

99 Pathways of the Heart

Pathway 13 – Ar-Rauf – Healing Wings

So after quite a long break, I decided today to pick back up on the pathways again because it felt like I needed to reconnect. The last few months have been a time for extreme expansion and inner healing for me and so I caught this pathway and found myself working through it. It’s always as if this book knows exactly what is needed and this is the beauty of life. If you seek answers, you’ll find them. Sometimes, it isn’t the answer we were looking for. Sometimes it is the truth and we find that hard to bear, but nevertheless it is an answer.

This pathway is about reconnecting your heart to Unity. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that we do not exist in isolation from others. I’ve always been quite a solitary person. I’ve also been a very strong person and my story always goes, “I don’t need anyone.”

The one thing I have learnt from my story is that when you give off the vibe that you don’t need anyone, you attract people that couldn’t care less about you. Have a think about that one. I know I did.

Receiving help and healing from others is one of the hardest things that I have had to learn. I am still learning it if I’m really honest.

This pathway for me showed me what that was all about. The last few months for me have been a struggle to stay in balance. When the ego falls away, we feel lost. When all our beliefs are challenged, we question who we are. When we feel lost, we need help and coming in to balance means that we need to connect on three deep levels.

Firstly we need to connect with Divine Source to truly be able to see the world through Creator’s eyes. We need to connect deep within ourselves to discover our desires and joy. We also need to connect ourselves with everything that is around us because like I said, we do not exist in isolation.

Without going in to too much detail, I’ve had experiences over the last few months that have really challenged me on all three levels and the expansion and awareness has changed me. For me this pathway is about recognising the struggle that we have when we become disconnected.

We think we have everything sussed and sorted and then along comes someone or something that brings out a whole lot more in you that needs to be healed. Someone or something that makes you question what you believe in. Someone or something that makes you admit what you really want isn’t in alignment with your story. Someone or something that allows you to open up and receive help and healing.

It is opening on a deep level and often these things are unexpected and meant to throw you off balance. All UNLEARNING is learning and part of the soul’s journey is to disconnect to be able to reconnect. We can arrive in a comfort zone with our spirituality unless we continuously challenge what we hold to be true. That in itself brings us to a better understanding of the Divine, of ourselves and of the world around us.

This separation between ourselves and Creator/ourselves/our world is something I want to touch on because for a lot of empaths like me, we have this yearning for home. We don’t know where home is but we have always had this longing and this deep sadness because we feel separated from it. Those of you who know, will know.

This pathway pointed to something quite poignant for me. It led me to explore all the times that I had tried to heal the separation within myself. The separation and disconnectedness can be healed through this idea that we are part of Unity. That is home.

Being spiritual isn’t simply about a set of ideals and beliefs. It’s about connecting on the three levels that I have mentioned. It is about striving to achieve that balance within yourself. It’s about repairing all the connections and this for me is the deepest kind of healing.

Sometimes we are shown through trauma and experience. Sometimes we are shown by another person who has entered our lives to teach us this very lesson. All I know is that you need to dig deep and challenge what you think you already know about yourself. For me, it was reminding myself that I also need help.

It is when I need help, comfort, affection that I am at my most vulnerable because it challenges my story. I’m admitting this here and now and I’m choosing to see this as a strength. Over the last few months, I’ve seen what compassion really is from people I would not have expected it from and it’s taken me to new depths in the way I operate in the world.

I’ve learnt what it means to receive compassion and real love and to be able to express it for another. I’ve learnt that I am absolutely safe being vulnerable because I trust that Divine is always looking out for me. I’ve learnt that when I am out of balance, I need to heal the separation within myself.

This pathway took me to a whole new level of opening within myself. I thought my heart was open and I’ve learnt that even though it is open, it can open so much wider.

Energy Updates

Ascension Energy Update 12th October 2018

WOWZERS! It’s time for another ascension energy update. I feel like it’s been a while and I can only apologise that I have not been writing as much but here I am and better late than never!

This new moon has seriously had us all exhausted! The energies have been so intense and I for one have been feeling it physically. It’s like having sleepy syndrome and there hasn’t been much time for me to sleep.

The healing room has seen some massive breakthroughs over the last week or so and I think this is the theme for October. It is officially breakthrough month on all levels.

It feels like we are all being asked to step and challenge ourselves to transition in to our next phase of ascension. The energy has been making us feel very tired with this feeling of “how long can I keep going?” It feels like burnout but it really isn’t. There is a need to push beyond this veil and there is a definite need to step up.

This week there will be something that happens that makes you feel certain that it’s time to step up. You’ll be overwhelmed with fear but honestly just remember what I’m telling you and roll your sleeves up and fight for what you want.

As lightworkers, we really suffer from procrastination and we can find reasons not to stretch ourselves. This is the time. It has always been the time. We talk about preparing ourselves quite a lot and intuitively knowing when we are ready.

The truth of the matter is this.

Your entire life has led you to this moment. You are ready. Hell you were born ready and it’s about time you realise it.

I’m in the headspace now where I have to give myself the Rocky speech every day and HURR myself on to keep going and I can feel that we are all breaking through. It may be next new moon when situations are resolved but if there’s a time to take action, it is now. This moment is defined by all previous moments and if it’s come in to your head, you are ready for it.

It doesn’t matter whether or not you can see progress. Feel it. Feel that the Universe is at work on your behalf. Set your intentions because energy follows intent.

The most important thing though is to cut out distractions. It’s all about you now.

Make this week a good one because it’s in your power to do so!

My next stage is to begin getting more active on my visual platforms as that is the thing that I’m feeling needs to be done so watch this space!!

If you’ve not already subscribed to my YouTube channel, please do by clicking this link.

I don’t have many followers and I need all the help I can get so I’d be really grateful for this. Also, if you do have ideas/questions that you’d like me to make videos about, let me know!

Energy Updates

Weekly Ascension Energy Update 20th September, 2018

Weekly Ascension Energy Update

Has it been chaotic for you too? Ascension energy this week has had us rockin’!

The last few weeks have been what feels like an uprising of the old coming to the surface to be cleared and there is a hell of a lot of shit to be cleared. The ascension energy is throwing us around so fast that we don’t know whether we are coming or going at the moment. All we know is that we are NOT who we used to be and we will not settle for what we used to.

There’s a lot to take in and for many of us, the last couple of weeks have taught us where we stand. There’s been some tensions but finally we can acknowledge that it is OUR own journey that we need to be responsible for. Everything else is needing to take a back seat at the moment.

Sometimes in life we need others to hold space for us. Just to listen. Just to be there. The ascension energies have been rampant and what many are finding is that their NEED is not being met by the people around them. This leads to a conscious decision to go solo. It has also led to many of us taking a step back and really beginning to evaluate the connections and what they add to our lives and our sense of wellbeing.

It’s no bad thing all this taking a step back. It’s been so intense this year that we haven’t had the time to ponder and reflect. As a result, we’ve carried elements of the old in to the new and we’re really starting to understand which relationships are actually maintenance work and therefore draining our energy.

September’s Energy

September is the holding space and use it to tie up loose ends and cut loose the straggly bits. My advice is do this with no apologies. Yes there will be casualties as you undertake a massive cull but this is all to bring you in to alignment with who you are and where you’re heading. All of this is about you now.

A lot of us are reaching that crossroads where we need to choose between ourselves and others. Choose YOU! Period.

It’s tumultuous to say the least but now is not the time to settle for what was. Now is the time to create. The ascension energies are ripe for it. We have the Equinox on the 22nd and a full moon on the 24th. What we create now is what will harvest for us.

A friend of mine pulled a card for me the other day and it was Cornucopia. I think it captured what’s to come. The harvest really is on it’s way but this bit of the journey will take balls.

The situations that are created for us to be able to experience this shedding mean that we have to stop being pansies and grow a pair. For empaths, the most difficult bit is this. We can go all gung ho cutting people loose but our hearts will always get called back to helping and this becomes the trap.

Tips for getting through these energies

My advice is CHOOSE YOU. Period.

On a practical level, start evaluating each and every relationship for what it is. Is there a balance? Is there a fair exchange? Are you giving willingly or do you feel like you’re being taken from?

If there is balance and you’re getting as much as you give, keep it. Your bones will tell you what and who doesn’t feel right and you take responsibility for dealing with that. It’s not that you’re cutting people out forever. It’s simply right now you need all your focus and energy for yourself. If we don’t do this, we have to deal with the feeling of being left behind. That’s a low vibration and certainly not one that we want to be in if we are creating our future.

Everything is temporary. Nothing is forever. This is the big shake up and it’s time to put your money where your mouth is in a lot of ways. Times will test us, but that inner knowing will never let us down.

I would even go so far as to say that the next couple of weeks are pivotal and we need to be really mindful and aware of what our energy is doing. Pay attention to what’s within. Pay attention to what surrounds you. If there is a mismatch, do what you need to in order for there to be balance.

If all else fails and you can’t see the wood for the trees, one of my favourite tools to use is Raw Black Obsidian. This will bring anything negative to the surface quickly and enable you to deal with it at the root. You may find it unleashes chaos but if you’re craving change and you know it needs to be in your face for you to do something about it then Obsidian is the catalyst.

Stay present and just watch it all unfolding for you. Look at the bigger picture. Play the long game.

We’re in exciting times and the light downloads are intense and heavy. Keep riding it and if you need help, you know I’m here!

For previous ascension energy updates, CLICK HERE